painkiller post

am i in a lot of pain? yes.

are these painkillers on top of me? also yes.

a tiny revelation that has come from texting all of the people in my phone, eating a bag of nachos, losing and regaining various levels of feeling in different parts of my body, and trying to feel drowsy but feeling just…woozy instead: people can suck, but if you’re good, you can be good. you can be good, and not suck.

everyone is so so worthy. everyone is worthy of effort and companionship and unconditional love from somewhere. everyone is worthy of consequence. everyone is worthy of sleeping in their bed of worms sometimes. everyone is worthy of malaphors. (malaphors are craaaaaazy yo i love them)

it’s alright. the world is a mess. apocalypse now? maybe. building blocks of our reality falling out of the sky like that light in the truman show? absofuckinglutely. but it’s alright. one day, some boss ass pal is gonna wake up and remember that they can do that thing they’ve so badly wanted to have been done. i hope we’re all that pal one day.

my head is in my shoes y’all.

love n light
shalom

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