SLUT|| the identity series

Recently, I’ve been thinking more about who I am,  why I am that person and what it means in terms of the way that I live. “Recently” is issue sensitive- some I’ve been pondering for a year, and others for closer to eight. Either way, this is what it culminates in: a series of posts concerning something vital to my being: identity.


Okay, so that title wasn’t what you were expecting.

To be honest, it wasn’t what I was expecting either. I had no clue I was going to write this post, until I scrolled down my own instagram profile. (Also, Shalom posting twice a week???? She definitely doesn’t have two serious exams in the next four days, like maths and physics!!! She’s so not procrastinating out of panic!!!!)

I was publically slut shamed for the first time twenty-two weeks ago.

Slut-shaming is a form of social stigma applied to people who are perceived to violate traditional expectations for sexual behaviors, commonly applied to women and girls. Some examples of circumstances where women are “slut-shamed” include violating accepted dress codes by dressing in perceived sexually provocative ways, requesting access to birth control,[1][2][3]having premarital, casual, or promiscuous sex, or being raped or otherwise sexually assaulted (which is known as victim blaming).

(thanks, Wikipedia.)

slut

this is taken directly from my instagram, and the caption was, ” ‘who are you getting cute for?’ MY DAMN SELF. Happy Friday, pals!”

Don’t get me wrong, it had happened before. Just never to this extent and to the point where I was affected enough to change something I did every week (i.e go to youth group) for five years.

I wore this outfit because I felt good in it. I liked the way my legs looked. I love that red sweater because it belongs to a gorgeous friend of mine (Sorry Shivs, you’ll never get that back, ily) and I think of her every time I wear it. I felt great, and I was going out to an event with a group of teenagers (13-19) and all was well.

Until I got told I was “asking for it”. That I was “distracting the younger boys” and “being irresponsible” with my body. Until I was informed that “you’re not supposed to dress like a slut at church”.

Yes, I went to church.

It’s safe to say that after that fateful Friday night, I didn’t return to Youth for weeks. “Matric is just so busy,” I’d tell everyone. It’s whatever. Onto the point of this post:

I was slut shamed because I was comfortable with myself for the first time in a long time and other people were not. I was slut shamed because I am a female and due to my gender I have been sexualised since my birth. I was slut shamed because my extreme “irresponsibility”, which was manifested in the exposure of probably 40 centimetres of leg and my stomach, is not appropriate around “the younger boys”. I was slut shamed for how I dressed and it is bullshit.

Here’s the thing about reclamation, people: once it happens, the people who once used the word in question negatively no longer have any functional power over it.

Screenshot (202) Screenshot (203)

The word slut is being reclaimed. It’s happening,and there is undeniable proof: slutwalks happen all over the world, and Tumblr is having none of anyone’s crap. There’s a thorough description of what slut shaming is and why it’s not okay here.

In brief? I’m the slut of the hour. And I’m 101% good with that.

love and light
shalom x

Scoot on ~ being angry

I’m angry.

I’m angry because of reasons, and legitimate ones at that. Not reasons like “the sky is bluer than it was yesterday and now the sky feels like it has an iferiority complex with itself of yesterday” though that too could be a pretty valid point.

I’m angry because racism still exists. I am so tired of racist people, you literally have no idea. I don’t care what colour you are, if I like the way you think (i.e. if you actually think) then I like you! And that’s how it goes for me. But we just have some RACIST ASS BEEPERS in this world and I have no clue why. “I hate white/black/asian people because my parents hate them.” DAHECK IS YOUR PROBLEM? DO YOU HAVE NO MIND? I think that racist people should be vapourised, because God could use that skin and body you’re being racist in for something else, like, hmm, I don’t know, pehaps a human being who treats other people with respect?

I’m angry because homophobia is till a thing. I cannot stand those people who think that their kids will “catch gayness” from being around someone who is EXACTLY the same but loves someone different to how you do. I don’t get it. Listen, if a kid comes out after talking to a gay person, THEY WERE GAY TO BEGIN WITH! Like stop this, “No don’t go there he’ll hurt you” or “Don’t let her come close to you” rubbish. I think it’s such crap and I think that anyone who’s homophobic deserves to be smacked once. Then have some sense drilled into their heads, with a drill if unnecessary.

Lastly, I’m angry because people are intolerant. And not just “Mmm yeah I cant deal walking away” intolerant, intolerant as in REFUSE to be in the same room with people because, I don’t know, they think they’re better somehow? They just refuse to put up with anyone who’s a little, bit , or a lot different to them? Nay. That I cannot do with. Those people need hugs. Then cereal, because if that cant fix them…nothing will.

Anyway, that’s all for tonight’s rant, and I’m really glad I got it out there. Also, to whoever’s reading this, I really and truly appreciate you. I mean I started this new blog because I needed newness in my life and seeing that someone read an article, or liked something makes me get 13 self esteem points. So thank you, beautiful creation. 

All my love all the time

-Scoot xx